LOCAL LIBRARY — A woman in her late thirties, henceforth known only as the Shelf-Shrieker, suffered a complete emotional breakdown Thursday afternoon upon discovering minor disorganization in her office bookshelf, sources confirm. The meltdown, described by witnesses as "absolutely unhinged" and "worse than story time with toddlers," lasted approximately forty-seven minutes and resulted in substantial property damage.

The incident began when the cardigan-clad cry-baby noticed several volumes had been returned to slightly incorrect positions on the wooden shelves behind her desk. What started as visible agitation quickly escalated into full-throated wailing that echoed through three adjacent reading rooms. Witnesses report the powder-blue-wearing wah-wah queen's face turned an alarming shade of crimson as tears streamed down her professionally made-up face, smearing mascara into what onlookers described as "raccoon territory."

The tantrum reached its apex when the alleged adult began physically assaulting her own bookshelf. Security footage shows her violently yanking books from their positions and hurling them across the office with shocking force. A leather-bound dictionary struck the far wall so hard it left a visible dent. The layered-necklace lunatic then proceeded to sweep entire rows of books onto the floor in furious arcs, screaming wordlessly between sobbing gasps. Her small clip-on microphone, still attached to her sweater, captured every shriek in crystal-clear audio.

"I've worked here nineteen years and I've never seen anything like it," said Margaret Whitmore, Head of Circulation. "She was literally stomping on fallen books. Stomping! On books! While crying so hard snot was running into her mouth. It was disturbing."

Jamal Henderson, IT Specialist, witnessed the suspect corner a junior librarian against the reference desk. "She got right in Sarah's face, jabbing her finger and shrieking something incomprehensible about alphabetization," Henderson recalled. "Sarah looked terrified. We all were."

The book-bludgeoning banshee then attempted to physically barricade herself behind the remaining standing shelves, pushing against them while ugly-crying and demanding everyone leave her "sanctuary." When a shelf began to tip dangerously, library security intervened. The subject collapsed to the floor in a heap, pounding the carpet with both fists like a toddler denied dessert.

"At one point she ripped her microphone off and threw it so hard it shattered against the door frame," said campus security officer Rita Delgado. "Then she screamed that nobody understood how important proper shelving was. Ma'am, this is a library. We all understand."

The hair-straightened howler was eventually escorted from the building, still hiccupping through residual sobs. Library administration confirmed that reorganization of the fiction section will proceed as planned, despite the beige-earring-wearing bawler's very public objections. The damaged books have been sent to repair.

No charges were filed, though witnesses say the emotional scars may take longer to heal than the drywall.